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Pamela Clapp's avatar

100% agree. I waited until I had the “dream career” to have my kids, and I’ve often reflected on how things probably would’ve worked out either way. Motherhood has a way of forcing clarity on your priorities, and with the extra support we get in France, it feels more possible to pursue our dreams after kids.

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Maddy Odom's avatar

Thank you for reading and sharing Pamela!! Things tend to work out regardless, and it all happens for a reason🤍 Happy to be here in France where we’re more freely able to pursue our passions and projects

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Shelby Chambers's avatar

This was so great to read, Maddy. I've been trying to articulate this for ages, thanks for putting it so well. Also, AGREED!

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Maddy Odom's avatar

Aw thanks for reading!!🤍

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Jessica Meltzer's avatar

“Yet when we view this as an evolution of self rather than a sacrificial undoing of who we were ‘before,’ it opens the door to who we’re meant to become.”

no words. so beautifully put 🥹

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Maddy Odom's avatar

Aww thank you so much for reading Jessica!!

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Bria's avatar

Love this so much!! I’ve never liked the “motherhood sacrifice” narrative of giving up everything, but it’s also so pervasive that I notice sneaky guilt showing up in places it doesn’t need to be. Thanks for putting this into words 💗

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Maddy Odom's avatar

Ohhh you’re totally right!! I’ll catch myself in the guilt sometimes too, but I know you’re doing such an amazing job on your motherhood journey!🤍

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Parisian Chronicles's avatar

Wow, I just subscribed on a bit of a whim and couldn't believe the synchronicity (I too got pregnant with my first child at age 22, and we moved to France with her when she was two years old. Her name is Maddy, btw. Crazy). Happy to have connected with you today!

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Maddy Odom's avatar

Oh hi!! So happy our paths have crossed. What an amazing coincidence! Looking forward to hearing more about your Parisian journey:)

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Shana Weisberg's avatar

PREACH Maddy!!!! You put words to much of the internal tension I've been feeling around how I'm approaching motherhood in Paris which is much more reflective of the French world we're living in, and the distance I feel from the language and values of parenting I hear when speaking with my U.S. based friends who are also navigating motherhood.

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Maddy Odom's avatar

It’s truly such a different world!! I’m glad to be navigating motherhood here, especially after a few years in the U.S.!

Thanks for reading as always❤️

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Jessica Alice's avatar

Love all of this. I'm not a parent, but I spent a decade looking after my younger siblings while my parents worked full-time. I literally had this conversation with someone the other day, saying they didn't have to put their life on hold because of their kids. ON THE OTHER HAND, I acknowledge all of the things I've done since being relieved of childcare duties: starting Substack, training as a counsellor, travel, etc. I think we need to be careful to acknowledge that while your life doesn't end when you have kids, you also have to be realistic about how much you can achieve, especially if you stay home to look after them.

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