In Preparation of a New Season
Hitting the reset button after a rollercoaster of a summer (and year.)
I’ve longed for this exact moment for nearly a year now. I’m sitting at our dining room table in our Parisian apartment. Our baby is playing in the other room with the best new caretaker. The sun is shining in from the courtyard and onto my hands as I type. Fresh fruits and veggies crowd the countertop. Remnants from lunch still next to me, which included amazing slices of sourdough bread, cheese from the fromagerie, a tomato quiche and these Parmesan cashews I’m newly obsessed with. Finally…I’m here. Beginning to build a new life I’m loving, with the space and alone time I’ve long craved.
Over the past year I’ve “blamed” my lack of professional progress on my personal responsibilities. “I just don’t have the capacity.” “I’m busy with the baby.” “I’m not getting good enough sleep at night.” “We’re moving to another country.” Some of which are completely valid reasons, while others have simply been excuses. But as I sit in this moment of stillness, I realize there are no more reasons or excuses in sight. The only thing getting in my way is myself.
There’s no denying that there’s been a lot on my plate this past year. Between being pregnant, having a baby, taking care of the baby and my other, older baby, then navigating an international move, life has been hectic. This summer in particular has felt like a marathon. We moved to another country, during which our daughter was out of school for over three months with essentially no childcare.
But simultaneously there has been moments of opportunity weaved into the chaos. For me to do something…anything. And yet, every opportunity that presented itself turned into a repetitive cycle that went something like this: Have an idea for something I want to pursue. Begin researching and compiling notes and documents. Start to turn said documents into more solidified offerings. Sit on it for a day or two. Question everything. Decide I actually don’t want to pursue that path. Start again.
As I write these words the visual that comes to mind is a paper jam. Like I’ve overloaded the paper tray and nothing can flow through anymore. The overload consisting of too many ideas, notes, questions and consumption. And if you also identify as a multi-passionate, you probably know the exact feeling I’m describing.
When we take a step back and look at the amount of content and messages we consciously and subconsciously receive everyday, it’s no surprise that our minds become jammed, with creativity and inspiration unable flow freely. Clarity nowhere to be found.
If you would’ve asked me at the beginning of last week what my next career move was going to be, I thought I’d be telling you about a very exciting new job position I’d accepted from a brand I’ve admired for years. The position composed many (if not all) of my passions in at least some way, from travel and experiential design, to editorial, branding and more, so when this opportunity crossed my path, I immediately refreshed my resume and wrote a cover letter that I hoped translated my passion onto paper.
After several weeks, I received a response notifying me that I’d been selected for an interview, which quickly turned into a second interview and a third, and final interview with the CEO of the company. In my mind, it felt like a done deal given how swiftly they moved me through the process and the phrasing of their communication, until I received the unfortunate news that they had selected a “more junior” candidate for the senior-level position. Confused and disappointed, I was back to the drawing board of trying to figure out my next professional move for this upcoming season of life. And here I am now…at the drawing board.
So the question becomes, how do we clear the paper jam? How can we begin to break the patterns that are blocking our progress? Receiving the job rejection acted as a final straw of sorts as it made me realize I needed a “cleanse,” and what better time to hit the reset button than the week our daughter returned to school? I knew this week would be a time for establishing new routines and daily habits. In other words, a fresh start to the season (both in my life and in nature.)
How I’ve Reset Recently:
In case you find yourself in a similar position, here are a few things I’ve done over the past week that have helped me reset and prepare for this upcoming chapter:
SOCIAL MEDIA DETOX
The first step to “clearing the paper jam” was to limit the input, which to me meant significantly reducing the amount of content I was consuming. My initial plan was just to delete Instagram, but I quickly realized I was subsequently replacing it with scrolling on Pinterest and Substack. So I ended up also deleting these two apps as well (hence my recent Substack hiatus!) With Instagram being the platform I consume most, I anticipated I’d miss it a lot more than I did. Even a week in, I still don’t have a craving to log back on (aside from to answer a few DMs.) This time has shown me that I need to establish more formal boundaries with the way that I consume and interact with these apps, especially Instagram. I also believe that I will continue to take hiatuses more regularly.
DIGITAL DECLUTTER
In the spirit of “cleansing,” the next thing I did was declutter my digital world, which included my desktop and Notion (old documents, dated to-do lists, content ideas, etc.) Also, before I temporarily deleted my Pinterest app, I cleaned up all of my boards. As I mentioned above, my past year or so has been composed of many unfinished ideas, and my Notion documents and Pinterest boards were evidence of this!
RE-ESTABLISHING DAILY PRACTICES
With our daughter returning to school and full-time childcare for our son, re-establishing my daily practices has been a current goal. Prior to having our baby a year ago, I had really amazing daily practices, including morning meditation and journaling, as well as nightly reading. However, these practices kind of got tossed to the wayside over the course of the past year. While I didn’t neglect them entirely, they were no longer part of my daily routines, which has negatively impacted my life. I know it will take some time to re-establish these practices and routines, especially as we’re in a new country and home, but I’m already feeling more “myself” after simply a few days of practice and structure. Plus, incorporating movement as a daily habit has also made such a noticeable difference. Thanks to the walking culture here that we definitely did not have in Austin!
SOLO DATES
This! I am someone who needs my alone time to refuel, which is also why this past year and summer have been such a challenge for me. I recently met up with a friend who told me that Fridays are her solo days. The baby stays at home with her husband and she has the day to roam around Paris, meet with friends and do whatever she feels like doing. While I haven’t adopted the entire day to myself, I have started going on “solo dates,” which has looked like a reading in a coffeeshop, to a recent visit to the Hotel de la Marine. This time alone means prioritizing my inspiration and exploration.
WARDROBE REFRESH
Mainly for my kids, as we moved to Paris with four suitcases, and I don’t really have much of a wardrobe to refresh! But as our daughter headed back to school, and with our baby growing more each day, editing their wardrobe in preparation for the fall season felt like another essential fresh start.
In summary, these actions have provided a necessary “cleanse” of sorts. Now that the week is coming to a close, I’m feeling ready to move into this next chapter with more confidence and ease. Yes…many unknowns still remain, but my current goal is to find clarity through action, not solely through research, questioning and searching. As for this space, I look forward to investing more time and energy here, and creating content that is equally valuable and inspirational, whether it’s Paris-related resources, or personal essays on building an aligned creative career and lifestyle. If you have any ideas or topics you’d like to hear more about, please leave a comment or send me a DM! I’d love to hear from you.
Until next week,
I love all the sentiments you’ve communicated and they are spot on for things going on with me (and I bet many others, too!) Merci 💙
Love this Maddy, so pleased to hear you are making steps towards a life that gives you what you need. It’s always hard to remove the ‘paper jam’ but I find this time of year really constructive to doing just that. Working on a jam of my own over here!